Wake Me Up From This Broken Dream pleaseee!!!
2012 gone by in a blink... whats left to recollect is how I called in that "famous all over the world calendar year " and this "I am glad you came.......well lets see year"!! Studies and Exams it was... gosh the academics out here I tell you. One can go on scribbling answers over endless pages and land up being nothing but raw when in the industry !! Time to pull up the sleeves and dive into practical learning now- like HIGH TIME!!!
Sometimes... all that one has planned about just seems like a mirage, it draws you in and then leaves you disappointed .
I am still on the road with too many curves and bends. Yes, there are days when I wish for an easier way to be out because sometimes all that happens is a little too much to deal with at one time. The road gets blocked , the vision gets blurred , the story sounds like a broken record and the only thing your heart can manage to mutter is - Give Up Dammit.... just Give Up!!! Like and unending -clueless-pointless-emotionally and mentally draining maze!
Who are People? The wide- and so to say "wise" audience who judge us or that tiny inner voice that keeps squeaking a zillion things in a single go?! seriously who are people... the one you see... or the ones who see you??? .... the ones you know... or the ones you don't .... ??? or just one person .... its all that "people" you and I talk about .....??? and if at all it is that one person... then its YOURSELF!! Come to think of it ... what matters at the end of all the Who's is .. which one manages to take the lead - to make a difference in that bit of YOU!!! People aren't just additions ...they aren't just shades ..they aren't just numbers and voices.... its a summary of YOU!!! How and When.. turns out to be a gradual process.
Now... whats Heaven ??? ahhh...Happiness....Isn't it?
And What's Happiness???? making money ? topping an exam? making new friends? overcoming fears? talking to someone? meeting a person after ages? creating something? all that materialistic paradise? reading on a rainy day with hot chocolate milk ? a bike ride in winters? shopping? making people smile? breaking someones heart? being the love of someones life? facebooking? sports? making music?writing? star gazing? long beach walks? a kiss beneath the moonlight? a slow dance? a basket full of garden fresh strawberries ? watching little babies? photography ? nature? adventure? getting married? celebrations ? getting a deal? hearing i love you /miss you .. all those you's? watching a movie? a hug? moms shoulder? dad's advice? petty fights with siblings ? painting? travelling?making the dreams come true ? peace? moreeeeeee.......and soooooooo much...to add on to the list....... Just what is this happiness ?- Victory that prevails or Victory that fades... ??? Victory that you need? Victory that you earn ? Victory that is yours to call... or gifted by the world???? Is Happiness Victory........YES it is !!!! Its just like A Cake!!! We all Love it .... but we like our own kinda slice... with our choice of icing, flavor and our bit of Heaven ....!!! We spend all our life trying to grab a bite of this "customized" Slice!!!! ...and the only job left on us to do .... is... when we have grabbed that very bit ... of the heaven ... we gotta make it WORTH IT!
I have been busy like a rat trying to find cheese all day (sorry to get into food... its ticking 5.00am in the morning and all I can think about is food)... my heart took to penning anger and sadness due to various reasons... one of them being ... is feeling- of a loser..never good enough ... not even tiny bit capable.....
another being... the oh so family "much needed drama".... gosh they can never read me true...
and then ofcourse the one festival..college festival ..which I was working towards with all my heart and creativity... gets scrapped...
a wedding...... God... I just can't seem to enjoy them .. especially when there are streaks of jealousy... and the whole alienated feeling.... seeping in through and through and ripping you till your emotionally low and leveling up on anger ... anddddd....when in a roooooooooooooooom full of crowd... no matter where you walk up to... you are ALONEEE...
the sudden distance with friends... due to what so ever reason...
the no job....no money-- death rope...
the no weight loss...
the mounting expenses...
the "i am soooo tired to putting up with that smile"...
the " i miss an idiot" feeling....
and i could justttttt go on.......blah bleh blue.............kinda goes well... its winters... and I need to get a life.... but until then the blue can stay.....
while heaven shall weave itself...for me to seek it well!!!!!
Its's indeed a crowded place....
and all I know is a Face..... just the face...nothing beyond....nothing ...more inspiring as yet....!!!
Could I be anymore...droppy eyed???
.................Oh C'mon.... its just another day.... that will wind up with me whining again ...!!!
Hence... I said....
Wake Me Up From This Broken Dream pleaseee!!!
2012 gone by in a blink... whats left to recollect is how I called in that "famous all over the world calendar year " and this "I am glad you came.......well lets see year"!! Studies and Exams it was... gosh the academics out here I tell you. One can go on scribbling answers over endless pages and land up being nothing but raw when in the industry !! Time to pull up the sleeves and dive into practical learning now- like HIGH TIME!!!
Sometimes... all that one has planned about just seems like a mirage, it draws you in and then leaves you disappointed .
I am still on the road with too many curves and bends. Yes, there are days when I wish for an easier way to be out because sometimes all that happens is a little too much to deal with at one time. The road gets blocked , the vision gets blurred , the story sounds like a broken record and the only thing your heart can manage to mutter is - Give Up Dammit.... just Give Up!!! Like and unending -clueless-pointless-emotionally and mentally draining maze!
Who are People? The wide- and so to say "wise" audience who judge us or that tiny inner voice that keeps squeaking a zillion things in a single go?! seriously who are people... the one you see... or the ones who see you??? .... the ones you know... or the ones you don't .... ??? or just one person .... its all that "people" you and I talk about .....??? and if at all it is that one person... then its YOURSELF!! Come to think of it ... what matters at the end of all the Who's is .. which one manages to take the lead - to make a difference in that bit of YOU!!! People aren't just additions ...they aren't just shades ..they aren't just numbers and voices.... its a summary of YOU!!! How and When.. turns out to be a gradual process.
Now... whats Heaven ??? ahhh...Happiness....Isn't it?
And What's Happiness???? making money ? topping an exam? making new friends? overcoming fears? talking to someone? meeting a person after ages? creating something? all that materialistic paradise? reading on a rainy day with hot chocolate milk ? a bike ride in winters? shopping? making people smile? breaking someones heart? being the love of someones life? facebooking? sports? making music?writing? star gazing? long beach walks? a kiss beneath the moonlight? a slow dance? a basket full of garden fresh strawberries ? watching little babies? photography ? nature? adventure? getting married? celebrations ? getting a deal? hearing i love you /miss you .. all those you's? watching a movie? a hug? moms shoulder? dad's advice? petty fights with siblings ? painting? travelling?making the dreams come true ? peace? moreeeeeee.......and soooooooo much...to add on to the list....... Just what is this happiness ?- Victory that prevails or Victory that fades... ??? Victory that you need? Victory that you earn ? Victory that is yours to call... or gifted by the world???? Is Happiness Victory........YES it is !!!! Its just like A Cake!!! We all Love it .... but we like our own kinda slice... with our choice of icing, flavor and our bit of Heaven ....!!! We spend all our life trying to grab a bite of this "customized" Slice!!!! ...and the only job left on us to do .... is... when we have grabbed that very bit ... of the heaven ... we gotta make it WORTH IT!
I have been busy like a rat trying to find cheese all day (sorry to get into food... its ticking 5.00am in the morning and all I can think about is food)... my heart took to penning anger and sadness due to various reasons... one of them being ... is feeling- of a loser..never good enough ... not even tiny bit capable.....
another being... the oh so family "much needed drama".... gosh they can never read me true...
and then ofcourse the one festival..college festival ..which I was working towards with all my heart and creativity... gets scrapped...
a wedding...... God... I just can't seem to enjoy them .. especially when there are streaks of jealousy... and the whole alienated feeling.... seeping in through and through and ripping you till your emotionally low and leveling up on anger ... anddddd....when in a roooooooooooooooom full of crowd... no matter where you walk up to... you are ALONEEE...
the sudden distance with friends... due to what so ever reason...
the no job....no money-- death rope...
the no weight loss...
the mounting expenses...
the "i am soooo tired to putting up with that smile"...
the " i miss an idiot" feeling....
and i could justttttt go on.......blah bleh blue.............kinda goes well... its winters... and I need to get a life.... but until then the blue can stay.....
while heaven shall weave itself...for me to seek it well!!!!!
Its's indeed a crowded place....
and all I know is a Face..... just the face...nothing beyond....nothing ...more inspiring as yet....!!!
Could I be anymore...droppy eyed???
.................Oh C'mon.... its just another day.... that will wind up with me whining again ...!!!
Hence... I said....
Wake Me Up From This Broken Dream pleaseee!!!
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